To be or not to be...

How hard it is for us to let go of something we hold dearly once?
Like a cigarette for a smoker? Or a pet dog for dog lovers? Or simply that someone who had been, maybe even will be, someone whom you feel dearly for?

Now, it can be the love for a family member. It can be the love for a best friend. It can be the love for a partner... Whichever it is, it is not easy to let go.

I had figured out long ago why is it so difficult to let go of things? Because, we are very afraid that if we let it go, there will be this humongous void in our life that we do not know what to fill with... It is like cutting a pound of flesh from your body. Or it can be more painful than that...

Some people cannot take the agony and thus choose to escape... Maybe by getting drunk all the time, maybe by shutting oneself out from everything, maybe even by ending his/her life.

But then for most people, we simply adapt to the void and start to fill it with something else... Maybe pick up a sport? Maybe find a new pet? Maybe get a new partner? Maybe even turn gay... hahaha...

But there's something else that is very scary, especially when you are going through the "withdrawal syndrome". Thoughts such as maybe we should get back together. But then if we get back, what's next? Fight again? What happen if I decide to turn back, he/she already turned to someone else and there is no more room for me?

My personal opinion is, if both parties cannot sort out the fundermental reasons why we ended up in such a state, it is never wise to even think about getting back together. At least, both parties must agree that we want to work it out. And not just get back together and pretend that things are back to normal... That's is the most dangerous situation. The next time you fall out, it will be uglier.

And what's with your ex-partner finding someone else? Remember this, there's always someone out there that is better than you and more suitable for him/her. In the same manner, there is always someone out there that is better than him/her. For those of us in the corporate world, it is the same situation. Does it mean if you do not get a promotion, it means you are no good? More likely, it is because there is someone better than you. There's nothing to argue or even worry about... Why not focus on making the effort to do all your can while you are in it rather than start thinking why your effort is not reciprocated?

Even if you really have to let go... just be glad that you have been there... And start to look forward... maybe to the same thing but this time round, get things done right...